Tuesday, December 14, 2010

2.36 minutes of panic

I am not going to lie, I had a moment of about 2.36 minutes of panic when I found out that I was pregnant again.  I wondered if we were really doing the right thing for Lana.  Can I give her as much time as I want along with taking care of another baby?  Will she feel left out?  How am I going to do this with two around 2 years apart?  How can I love another as much as I love Lana? 

I am being serious with those questions as crazy as they may sound, but those were the rapid thoughts going through my head at lightening speed.  So, yes I did have a brief moment of total panic.  But, then I realized how silly I was being. 

We are giving Lana one of the most precious relationships she will ever have.  She will have a brother or sister.  I am sure she may not realize this now (or until maybe 20 years down the road), but I know she will be thankful to have a sibling.  My brother is one of my very best friends and we are giving her a best friend.  How neat is that!  Sure my house may continue to be a total mess and I may get dinner on the table even less than I do now, but I know we will work through it and that is not the stuff that matters anyways.  Family matters and ours is growing.

No comments: